I have a friend “Charles” and we had a disagreement, however I suspect that there are other difficulties standing in the way of our friendship. Do you have any advice on what I should do?
It is always the issue of two people. There is what you can do, what you have somewhat already done, and there is what the other person can do, wishes to do, wishes not to do. That is the dance of relationships upon your earth, but let us discuss this in a little more broad manner, not simply between you and this particular friend, but in the context of relationships, friendship relationships in general. What is to be expected?
Upon your earth, in relationships of such, there are unwritten rules that are observed by both or even more than two parties. It is as “I will do this”, and therefore you will do that, and it will balance, it will complement, it will enrich, and all of those are aspects upon which friendships, relationships are built.
What sometimes happens is that, for whatever reason, sometimes understood and known, sometimes, not so clearly seen, the relationship falters. It is as if a brick from the foundation has been removed, by one person, or by the other person, or sometimes by both people simultaneously. And it is not so much that there has necessarily been an argument, or a discussion, or a misunderstanding, occasionally the support for a relationship has already become a little unstable, it is already wobbling.
Sometimes friendships, relationships need to end, they need to terminate, and there are many reasons why that might have to happen. It might be that they no longer serve one or other person. It might be that someone within the relationship needs to move in a different direction, for better or for worse. There is no judgment, it is only that it can never continue the same way.
Nothing upon your earth will continue indefinitely in the same track, in the same direction. There always will be changes, and you know that is so for yourself in various aspects. Even when the big picture appears to be the same, perhaps with your job, there is still change from day to day, there is adjustment, there is movement in a different direction. Where once there was a passion for a particular unionization in the workplace, that has faded, be it for better, be it for worse. That is irrelevant, for you see, even you, change, you grow, you shift, you decide one day that it might be easier or better to do something in a different way.
Also with relationships, with friendships, be they casual or be they more intimate, the foundation of these is construed upon various beliefs, upon various needs, upon various situations that construct a particular lifetime, that construct a particular relationship, that construct whatever needs are required for one or more people. Those needs change, they shift.
Now, back to your question. With this particular friend, there is something that he needs to work out himself. Joshua can tell you that if the relationship is to be construed as a bridge, where you are on one side of the river and he is on the other side of the river, there is something that is not right in the foundation on the other side. Do not dismay yourself. It is not to say that anything is permanent. Be it the dismantling of the bridge, or the rebuilding of the bridge. There is simply change, and until he is able to restore the brick that has been removed on his side, there will be instability. And therefore, relax. It is not something that you did, it simply had to occur. If it had not happened this way, it would have happened in another way. When there is instability, the structure cannot stand as it is, and therefore the structure has to wobble and perhaps even topple, and that is what has occurred. It will either be rebuilt in a different form, or it will simply cease.